By now, you may have heard about the Russian government's latest goofy idea: Let's celebrate conception day!

It's funny, you see, because people are being told by the government to take a day off work and have sex. In order to make more babies, because this lack of babies is, in Vladimir Putin's words, the "most acute problem facing Russia."

I've mentioned this before, because Putin has previously offered cash and fabulous prizes to couples spawning red-blooded Russian kids. Well, OK, Putin has offered cash, and Governor Morozov of Ulyanovsk has tossed in the Monty Hall goodies, like A BRAND NEW SUV!

The map really says all there is to say, though. There's no shortage of babies on your continent, President Putin and Governor Morozov. You're planning-type people! Come up with a plan! And make it less on the gas guzzlers and more on the warm families! Thanks.

Chinese babies are, of course, the very best babies, but one in particular is on the way to become very special indeed, thanks to the name "@". In English, it's most commonly known as the "at-symbol." In Italian, it's known as "the snail." But in Chinese, "@" is called "ai ta," which can mean "I love him" (or "I love her" - ta can be male or female).

Which is a sweet thing to think about the next time you're writing an email.

Meanwhile, American families are still jetting over to China and @ing kids out of Social Welfare Institutions, and American (and Canadian) kids adopted from China are jetting over to the China Center of Adoption Affairs culture camp in Beijing, and they don't ever have to worry about flying China Airlines because their planes never crash.

As far as you can see them, anyway. One wonders what it's like to be the guy whose job it is to go to the crash site to paint over the logo. It makes sense, on one level. It's even (grimly) funny, on another. But dude!